Title: I used to love him Chapter: 10 - Used to? Rating: Summary: Characters: Genre: Warnings: English is not my native language Disclaimer: This site is no way associated with "As the World Turns", CBS, P&G, or Van Hansis and Jake Silbermann. This is not for profit. No copyright infringement is intended. Authors submit and write their own work.

A few hours later Noah slowly started waking up and opened his eyes. He didn’t know where he was and he could feel that something was wrong… he tried to move a little and felt searing pain going through his arm

“Ah… shit…”

His hand… it was killing him. He looked around and realized that it was already dark. He had spent half day in the hospital and another half asleep in Luke’s sofa. Great. He saw Luke sitting down not far from him

“Hi…”

“You okay?”

“It hurts like hell”

“I saw the prescription for your painkillers and went to get them. I can get you some water”

“I can’t believe… did I just fall asleep? Just like that?”

“Yes”

“I’m sorry”

“I can call a taxi for you”

“No… not going anywhere, I told you… or maybe I didn’t, I can’t remember”

“Yes, you did, with a bunch of other crazy ideas”

“Like what?”

“Like saying that you need me… and that you are in love with me”

“Then it’s not that crazy, it’s true”

“We don’t know each other anymore, Noah”

“I don’t care. I want to be with you. Last night was amazing… wasn’t it for you? I am having problems believing this is normal for you…”

“Don’t start with that again”

“This morning when I found you in my living room you told me you weren’t used to that”

“Maybe I was lying”

“No, you weren’t”

Luke stood up and moved away from Noah

“I have made some soup… I’ll heat it up for you”

“Help me understand what changed”

Luke went into the kitchen and Noah stood up holding his hand againt his chest and followed him

“Luke”

“You weren’t so pushy 7 years ago”

“I learnt my lesson the hard way, believe me”

“I don’t want to talk”

“I am not going anywhere until you tell me what’s changed”

“You are a pain…”

“Talk to me, damn it, Luke, you were the one that said that nothing is stopping us””

“Stop throwing everything I said at my face”

“So?”

“So what?”

“What’s stopping us?”

“I told you, we don’t know each other. We are just a couple of strangers and…”

“And?”

“You told her… that it was a one night stand”

“Who? Lisa?”

“Yes… I heard her telling you that you weren’t the kind of guy that had one night things with guys and you told her that maybe she didn’t know you that well…”

He kept doing things around the kitchen, getting a bowl, and a spoon and Noah just looked at him

“You didn’t wait to hear the rest of the conversation”

“I had enough…”

“I told her that I would have a one night stand with you if that was all you were going to give me… I told her you are the one”

Luke stopped moving around and looked at the soup as if it was going to give him all the answers

“You said that?”

“Yes, she’s my neighbour and she’s been a good friend. That’s it”

“The way you reacted when you heard the keys… I thought you were going to tell me to hide in the closet”

Noah blushed

“Shit, she was going to catch me in my underwear with a guy, not a very comfortable situation”

“No, I guess not”

“I want to be with you, Luke, I really want to”

Luke looked at him and decided to be honest with him. He had given himself to him last night and now he was going to do it again… the guy had come twice looking for him, had even gotten a broken hand and still he came back wanting to talk and wanting him…

“Aren’t you scared?”

“Scared?”

“Yeah… it was very hard when you left and… aren’t you scared it won’t work? I don’t want to go through that again, Noah”

“It was hell for me too. Wondering how you were and if you hated me for what my father had done to you, but I need to try. There’s no way I can go on not being with you now. Not after last night”

Luke looked back down at the soup again

“Luke. Look at me”

Luke couldn’t help himself and followed Noah’s orders

“Give me a chance, I won’t fail you again, let me show you”

“I’m in your hands again…”

“And I am in yours, don’t you know that already? I love you, I’m in love with you”

“I love you too…”

Noah closed the distance between them and put his good hand in Luke’s cheek and his forehead on Luke’s

“I won’t let you down, I do love you”

“I’m sorry about your hand”

Noah smiled at him

“It’s ok, you’ll have to take care of me, though. You think you could?”

Luke smiled and nodded. Noah looked at him and realized that he was being given a second chance. He could try again. Noah kissed Luke and they hugged.

“I’m so happy you are giving me another chance…”

“There was nothing I could do… I used to love you so much…”

“Used to?”

Luke smiled and put his hand in Noah’s neck

“I guess I never really stopped loving you”

==========

The morning after arrived and found them in Luke’s bed. Noah was lying down on his back and Luke was on his side, with an arm thrown across Noah’s shoulders. They woke up to a ringing noise somewhere around and Luke picked up his mobile phone from the night table

“Snyder”

“Hey, Snyder”

“Hey”

Luke moved and hit Noah’s hand by mistake

“Ahh, shit…”

“Sorry, babe…”

He heard laughs from the other side of the phone.

“What was that? Is there a man in your bed with you?”

“Erhm… yes…”

Luke looked at Noah and smiled. He looked really cute with his hair standing up, he was still sleepy and was looking at Luke with love in his eyes. Noah smiled back at him and took his hand in his.

“Do you mind if I call you later, Mads?”

He saw the surprise in Noah’s eyes

“Just tell me something… is Noah, right?”

Luke smiled

“Who else?”

He heard Maddy laugh again

“Good, I’m happy for both of you, Luke, say hi to him from me, ok?”

“I will, thank you, Maddy”

“Call me later, Snyder”

And with that she hung up the phone at the same time as Luke.

“Maddie?”

“Yes, she says hi”

“How is she? Is she”

Luke put the tip of his finger on Noah’s lips

“She’s good. Do you still love me?”

Noah smiled

“What kind of question is that?”

“I might need to ask you every morning just to be sure, and you might need to show me every morning, just to be sure too, you know?”

Noah smiled and drew Luke’s face close to him

“No problem, I think I can live with that”

They kissed and looked into each other’s eyes smiling

“I can live with that too”

Epilogue