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Chapter 2 - Heart
| Title: Mind against Heart Chapter: 2 - Heart Rating: Summary: Characters: Genre: Warnings: Please read the introduction first and keep in mind that English is not my native language Disclaimer: This site is no way associated with "As the World Turns", CBS, P&G, or Van Hansis and Jake Silbermann. This is not for profit. No copyright infringement is intended. Authors submit and write their own work. |
“Noah?”
He couldn’t answer, he felt like if he opened his mouth he would start crying like a baby. He could feel Luke’s stare fixed on him
After a few minutes Luke just looked at the water again and they both stayed silent. Noah felt the pressure on his chest. Everything he had felt all the past year, the sorrow… everything was pushing to get out.
Did you think of me while I was gone?
“I thought that you might not remember me after all this time…”
Luke smiled
“You must be kidding…”
“We hadn’t known each other for very long, just last summer”
Luke smiled and blushed a little
“I had a crush on you, remember?”
How could I forget?
“Yes, but I thought that maybe you had found a nice guy and”
Please, say no…
“No… there’s no one. Not a lot of gay guys around in Oakdale, I’ve met one or two in college, but I guess it’s not as easy as I thought.”
He kept smiling looking at the pond
“Or maybe I am not that easy, who knows?”
Do you still care for me?
“I’m sure you don’t have the same feelings for me anymore”
Mind and heart getting closer…
Noah looked at Luke when he didn’t answer
“Luke?”
“I’ve thought of you a lot…”
Me too, couldn’t get you out of my head
“I thought of you too”
Luke looked at Noah now, they stared at each other
I wanted to kiss you, still want to…
“That night after we went swimming… you were right, something happened”
“Why did you leave Maddie?”
For you
“She told you I left her?”
Luke just nodded
“I didn’t love her… not the way it should be…”
“Did you realized that when you were away?”
It was Noah’s turn to nod
“She told me you asked about me”
Yes, I needed you, not her
“Yes… you didn’t write me back, when I wrote”
“I was mad at you”
“Why?”
“The way you treated me before you left, after that night…”
“I’m sorry”
Luke stayed quiet looking at the pond again. Noah wished he could speak with his heart once and for all, why was he such a coward?
I know now… that I love you
“By the time I decided to write back you were the one who didn’t answer”
“What? You wrote?”
“Yes”
“I never got it… they sent me abroad and I never got any letters”
So sad waiting for someone to care about me all these months
“Where did you go?”
Hell, didn’t I tell you?
“Afghanistan”
“What? I thought you weren’t supposed to go to war so soon…”
“My father insisted, he said that Afghanistan would make me a man”
And it turned me into a little boy, scared and alone
“I am sorry, Noah… are you ok? Did anything happen to you over there?”
So many questions and such a worried voice. He was looking at Noah, maybe expecting to see a war wound or some scars
I have scars, but inside, you can’t see them
Luke put his hand on Noah’s shoulder and tried to make him turn so he could see him better, still looking for the scars that weren’t there
“I’m okay”
“Shit, I didn’t know… I would’ve written to you… it must have been so hard…”
It was hell… I thought I told you
“Yes”
Memories flooding his mind, of young soldiers just like him who didn’t want to be there, of kids with fear in their big eyes, of his own fears. Of dead and destruction. Just the thought of it brought tears to his eyes and made his heart push his mind harder trying to make room for his feelings to reach the surface, to get some air so they would stop drowning him.
He wiped a tear away with his hand, trying to do it so Luke wouldn’t notice. But Luke was looking at him
“Shit, Noah… you are not okay, are you?”
Noah just shook his head. He put his elbows in his knees and his head in his hands. He could feel Luke moving closer to him, resting an arm across his shoulders
“Why Oakdale? Why did you come here of all the places?”
You
“…You…”
Finally his feelings were surfacing, inhaling air and getting stronger. He felt Luke’s arms holding him tighter, making him rest his head in his shoulder. He felt a kiss on top of his head
“For me?”
You are all I care about… all I want, you are…
“You are all I have… no family or friends… I thought that maybe you still cared about me, even if it was just a little”
“You silly man… I wish it was only a little”
Luke kissed him again on the head and held him tighter
Oh, Luke… I
“I care about you too”
He felt Luke’s hands on his face, making him look at those beautiful eyes
“That night we went swimming… I knew something had happened”
That night...
“I fell in love with you”
Luke just looked at him and for a moment Noah’s heart stopped beating. Then Luke closed the distance between them and brushed his lips with Noah’s. Noah looked at him and reached for him putting his hand on Luke’s neck. He moved him closer and kissed him. Just like he had dreamed every day and night for the last year. Just like he had hoped he could do one day.
When they broke the kiss they were both smiling
“I feel like if I were dreaming”
“Me too, don’t wake me up. I’ve been so alone and cold for the last months…”
Luke smiled and caressed his face, he kissed him again
“And now?”
Noah smiled too, he felt more alive than he’d ever felt. Kissing Luke had been better than in his best dreams
“I am warm, now”
Luke smiled at him
“I think you are hot”
They looked at each other and laughed holding onto each other tightly. They kissed again and again, stopping only to talk about their feelings and their future together.
Life was good again, it was perfect.
The end
He couldn’t answer, he felt like if he opened his mouth he would start crying like a baby. He could feel Luke’s stare fixed on him
After a few minutes Luke just looked at the water again and they both stayed silent. Noah felt the pressure on his chest. Everything he had felt all the past year, the sorrow… everything was pushing to get out.
Did you think of me while I was gone?
“I thought that you might not remember me after all this time…”
Luke smiled
“You must be kidding…”
“We hadn’t known each other for very long, just last summer”
Luke smiled and blushed a little
“I had a crush on you, remember?”
How could I forget?
“Yes, but I thought that maybe you had found a nice guy and”
Please, say no…
“No… there’s no one. Not a lot of gay guys around in Oakdale, I’ve met one or two in college, but I guess it’s not as easy as I thought.”
He kept smiling looking at the pond
“Or maybe I am not that easy, who knows?”
Do you still care for me?
“I’m sure you don’t have the same feelings for me anymore”
Mind and heart getting closer…
Noah looked at Luke when he didn’t answer
“Luke?”
“I’ve thought of you a lot…”
Me too, couldn’t get you out of my head
“I thought of you too”
Luke looked at Noah now, they stared at each other
I wanted to kiss you, still want to…
“That night after we went swimming… you were right, something happened”
“Why did you leave Maddie?”
For you
“She told you I left her?”
Luke just nodded
“I didn’t love her… not the way it should be…”
“Did you realized that when you were away?”
It was Noah’s turn to nod
“She told me you asked about me”
Yes, I needed you, not her
“Yes… you didn’t write me back, when I wrote”
“I was mad at you”
“Why?”
“The way you treated me before you left, after that night…”
“I’m sorry”
Luke stayed quiet looking at the pond again. Noah wished he could speak with his heart once and for all, why was he such a coward?
I know now… that I love you
“By the time I decided to write back you were the one who didn’t answer”
“What? You wrote?”
“Yes”
“I never got it… they sent me abroad and I never got any letters”
So sad waiting for someone to care about me all these months
“Where did you go?”
Hell, didn’t I tell you?
“Afghanistan”
“What? I thought you weren’t supposed to go to war so soon…”
“My father insisted, he said that Afghanistan would make me a man”
And it turned me into a little boy, scared and alone
“I am sorry, Noah… are you ok? Did anything happen to you over there?”
So many questions and such a worried voice. He was looking at Noah, maybe expecting to see a war wound or some scars
I have scars, but inside, you can’t see them
Luke put his hand on Noah’s shoulder and tried to make him turn so he could see him better, still looking for the scars that weren’t there
“I’m okay”
“Shit, I didn’t know… I would’ve written to you… it must have been so hard…”
It was hell… I thought I told you
“Yes”
Memories flooding his mind, of young soldiers just like him who didn’t want to be there, of kids with fear in their big eyes, of his own fears. Of dead and destruction. Just the thought of it brought tears to his eyes and made his heart push his mind harder trying to make room for his feelings to reach the surface, to get some air so they would stop drowning him.
He wiped a tear away with his hand, trying to do it so Luke wouldn’t notice. But Luke was looking at him
“Shit, Noah… you are not okay, are you?”
Noah just shook his head. He put his elbows in his knees and his head in his hands. He could feel Luke moving closer to him, resting an arm across his shoulders
“Why Oakdale? Why did you come here of all the places?”
You
“…You…”
Finally his feelings were surfacing, inhaling air and getting stronger. He felt Luke’s arms holding him tighter, making him rest his head in his shoulder. He felt a kiss on top of his head
“For me?”
You are all I care about… all I want, you are…
“You are all I have… no family or friends… I thought that maybe you still cared about me, even if it was just a little”
“You silly man… I wish it was only a little”
Luke kissed him again on the head and held him tighter
Oh, Luke… I
“I care about you too”
He felt Luke’s hands on his face, making him look at those beautiful eyes
“That night we went swimming… I knew something had happened”
That night...
“I fell in love with you”
Luke just looked at him and for a moment Noah’s heart stopped beating. Then Luke closed the distance between them and brushed his lips with Noah’s. Noah looked at him and reached for him putting his hand on Luke’s neck. He moved him closer and kissed him. Just like he had dreamed every day and night for the last year. Just like he had hoped he could do one day.
When they broke the kiss they were both smiling
“I feel like if I were dreaming”
“Me too, don’t wake me up. I’ve been so alone and cold for the last months…”
Luke smiled and caressed his face, he kissed him again
“And now?”
Noah smiled too, he felt more alive than he’d ever felt. Kissing Luke had been better than in his best dreams
“I am warm, now”
Luke smiled at him
“I think you are hot”
They looked at each other and laughed holding onto each other tightly. They kissed again and again, stopping only to talk about their feelings and their future together.
Life was good again, it was perfect.
The end
Bitrixbf |
Latest page update: made by Bitrixbf
, Sep 23 2008, 12:00 PM EDT
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| merygordi | CH. 2 Loved it sis!!! (page: 1 2) | 25 | Oct 30 2008, 11:43 PM EDT by vernie06 | |
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