Two more weeks went by and Luke couldn’t stop thinking about Noah and what he’d said. He kept replaying all the times they had talked 7 years ago and all the things that happened. Noah kissed him! And more than once!

It was driving him crazy, he kept looking everywhere to make sure he didn’t miss him if they came across each other once more. But he hadn’t seen him and it was torturing him. He didn’t make him gay, he wasn’t a recruiting officer. He was going to have to do something before he went crazy. He would end this issue even if he died trying.

He managed to find out where Noah lived and went there fast, before he had time to change his mind. He had been waiting by the door for 1 long hour when he saw Noah entering the building. He moved towards him just in time to get inside before the door closed. He felt like a stalker, but he just couldn’t take any more days like that, remembering and feeling guilty.

“Noah”

Noah turned around and saw him

“Luke… what are you… how did you…”

“We have to talk”

“What? Now?”

“Yes, now”

“Mh… ok… do you want to come upstairs?”

“Yes”

By the time they reached the appartment Luke was getting madder and madder. They hadn’t spoken a word and Luke kept noticing different things about Noah. His hair was shorter and it really suited him, and he smelled wonderful, and

“Are you going to come inside or you’d rather stay in the hall?”

Luke entered the apartment feeling stupid. Noah left his suitcase on the coach and loosened his tie. Shit, he’s wearing a tie… so cute… cute? So hot.

“Do you want something to drink?”

“No”

“Go on, then, what did you want to talk about?”

“How could you say that to me?”

“What?”

“In the subway, Noah, you said you were sorry!”

“And I am… is that wrong?”

“Wrong? Shit, is just amazing! You are sorry you let me believe you were gay? What does that mean, uh? You are not gay anymore? You are bi, now? Because let me tell you something, you were gay 7 years ago. I didn’t make that up and I didn’t push you in to anything, you hear me? You kissed me, more than once, and you were the one saying that we had plenty of time. Pity I ended up in a wheelchair, right? I guess the idea of having a boyfriend in a wheelchair sucked, right?”

Noah was just looking at him.

“What are you talking about? Bi?”

“As in you are into both men and women?”

Noah laughed and Luke thought that he had never heard anything so sexy

“I’m not into men and women, what’s gotten into you?”

“You said it yourself, that you were sorry…”

Noah finished the sentence for him

“I am sorry I let you believe that there could be something between us. I didn’t know that meant that I was bi”

“You said that you weren’t like me…”

“Free to be what I was and with who I wanted to be”

“What do you mean…?”

“I mean that I couldn’t be with you just because I wanted to, I had to think about other factors”

“Factors? You left me in a hospital bed because you had to think about other factors?”

“My father, for instance”

“Your father is a murderer, and a bigot and”

“And he tried to kill you because I wanted to be with you”

“Because he is a sick man, that’s why”

“He was”

“What?”

“He died a couple of years ago in jail”

“I didn’t know… sorry?”

“For me he died when he tried to kill you”

“I am confused, here… you left me because you had to think about your father and yet you considered him dead?”

“I left you because being with you just hurt other people”

“Other people? Who?”

“Who? How can you ask that?”

“Who did we hurt by being together?”

“What’s the point, Luke, it was a long time ago and you’ve obviously moved on”

“I have obviously moved on? What does that mean?”

“You have a boyfriend, right? That guy that was with you the other day?”

“What? Jim?”

“I don’t know his name, haven’t had the pleasure of meeting him”

“You are being sarcastic now…”

“Really”

Noah took his tie off and opened the first buttons of his shirt while Luke looked at him smiling

“I don’t believe this… you are jealous…”

“So, is there aything else you would like to throw at my face? Is getting late and I am tired. I want to take a shower and”

“Oh, now you are putting images on my head…”

Luke was enjoying it now, Noah looked really uncomfortable

“What…?”

“You are blushing”

“If you are finished with what you wanted to say maybe you should go”

“He’s my editor, and he is very straight, believe me”

“Is none of my business”

“You are still gay…”

“Of course I’m gay”

“You felt something for me, Noah, didn’t you? I need to know…”

“You are the best thing that has ever happened to me”

“Then why?”

“I didn’t want to hurt any more people…”

“And you hurt me?”

“My father almost killed you, Luke, I hurt you more by being with you”

“But he was sick, it wasn’t your fault”

“It was because of me”

“But if you really think that I was the best thing that had ever happened to you…”

“I think we’ve established that already”

“You were”

“The worst thing that has ever happened to you”

“What? No!”

“Come on, Luke, I saw you in the hospital, you couldn’t move your legs and”

“And I was miserable. It took me a year to be able to walk again and get rid of the depression… depression for having lost you, Noah”

“I am sorry, but”

“But nothing. You hurt me leaving me more than your father shooting me, I don’t know about other people, and I don’t care, to tell you the truth. You were the best thing that’d ever happened to me, you still are. What we had… It was so good. I’ve never felt the same… have you?”

“No… of course not”

Luke held his head in his hands

“What’s stopping us now, Noah?”

“Now? You mean…?”

Luke smiled

“Yes, now”

He brought his face close to his and kissed him.

Chapter 7