Rating: PG Summary: Luke thinks about his past after Noah calls about his trip Characters: Luke, Lily mention, Damian mention Genre: Warnings: Disclaimer: This site is no way associated with "As the World Turns", CBS, P&G, or Van Hansis and Jake Silbermann. This is not for profit. No copyright infringement is intended. Authors submit and write their own work.

God, I hate that bastard so much. Stupid Damian. Noah has gone off my map and there is no way to bring him back until that Italian doofus goes back to where ever the hell he came from. I love him so much, I just can’t believe that Noah would just ditch me after he just tried to get me laid two days ago. My goodness this is so frikkin random we were like and old married couple and then good old bigot bio dad gets back in the picture. I’m so embarrassed that he touched me at the hospital while I was in bed and I mistook him for Noah. How the hell did I do that I should have known the vibe was off. Noah would have touched my shoulder or held my hand (damn it Damien did that). Well Noah wouldn’t have felt that cold and I would’ve seen the light from the door if he came back in. Gosh that was so embarrassing that freak was hiding in the bathroom. What a creep. I’m so sick of seeing his face, god I look so much like him I can barely stand myself. I’m pretty clingy to Noah, but then again I have nothing else to do I’m expelled and pissed off about it. Stupid election I still can’t believe that Kevin got away with that beer selling crap. That would have been hilarious if Noah made out with me in front of him. I hate that guy so much what did I ever see in him. I love how Noah was so possesive of me that day even in front of Reg. Damn It Reg is dead because of drugs and Noah is off on some short notice escape plan. Kevin is still president and I’m still like a stuck up little brat. I want to do something with my life but I don’t think I’m ready to go back to the foundation. Number one Damian’s stupid inheritance is the only reason I have that thing and second Brian. Great old Grandpa who tried to make passes at me. What the hell was I thinking when I kissed him he was like this old, suicidal, closet case who needed to collect love from people three times below his age to be sexually pleased. Crazy pervert, the only thing I thank him for is the fact that he helped me realize that Noah has a serious boner when it comes to me. Yeah, that would really make me feel better if only Noah wasn’t half across the globe. This is just like when he enrolled for the military and tried to leave without saying goodbye. Hellz No I was not having that not for “just a few years”. And to know he possibly wouldn’t even live through it all. He was so selfish. I was not letting him go without either kissing me goodbye, doing me goodbye or preferably stuffing me in his stupid military suitcase. He must have been on something, he knew good and well he didn’t want to do that type of service, he just wanted closure with his psycho dad. I still can’t believe that bastard tried to kill me. What the hell do I get myself into. I can’t believe that I keep going through all this shit on a daily basis. I need a break. Just like that day Noah tried to take a break with me and broke that stupid rented vase. Man was and is broke.
I know that Java does not give him a plentiful paycheck. And yet there he was buying meals for two. Himself and that ridiculous immigrant who’s name I refuse to recall. I still can’t believe that she could just kiss my Noah and expect to get away with it. Well she kind of did, damn it I should have punched her face in. She did it twice, why didn’t I tell that bitch off. Anyway Noah is trying so hard to keep up. I really want to help him but he’s determined to do this on his own I’d respect that if only he didn’t leave on a random vacations. I just want to stop thinking, my head hurts from keeping these stupid tears in. I want Noah back. Damn Flashbacks. Come to think of it I never went through stuff like this before I fell in love with that darn intern. Noah was so cute especially when he said "Nothing" before our first kiss. That lip lock was my signature into a world of chaos. At least we are going through all this stuff now. I don’t think that anything can pull us apart now, not even death. The only reason I still have hope for us is the way Noah begged me to not be mad at him. I was about to break down when he said I’m sorry after I accused him of not telling me about his trip and didn’t even seem to care that I was worried sick about him. I care more for him than he cares for himself. That’s sad and cute at the same time.
At least I was able to talk to Zoey she was actually decent to be around without Zach.
Man, my thoughts have never raced like this before I guess I just never really let all of this sink in. Come to think of it I hoard a lot of stuff. Okay so now what- forgive, relax, walk slower, breathe Luke. Noah will be back soon and we’ll be able to talk this all out it’ll be fine. Wait a minute, didn’t Damian talk to Noah at the Lakeview after Noah left the Lily pad. What if Damian plays a bigger role in the reason he’s gone. Probably would, that jerk’s whole purpose in life is to ruin my life and purify me. Well good luck with that I’m not a virgin anymore and guess what..... it’s because I went anal. In your face dad! What would I give to yell that in his face. You know what forget all of this Zen shit. What the hell is this!!!! Why is mom so close to this jerk face! Dear Gawd!!!!! Damian is everywhere!!!!!!!
I’m gonna grab this smacktard by the neck and strangle him. Why is he in my house!!!!!
“You came here to ruin my life!!!!!!!!!!! Well congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!! You did it!”